Spider-Man Marvel Legends 60th Ann. Amazing Fantasy 6-inch Action Figure
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Spider-Menace Action Figure: A Reluctant Review Listen up, web-heads! J. Jonah Jameson here, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but there's a new Spider-Man toy that's... ahem... not entirely terrible.
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Hasbro's latest cash-grab, the "Spider-Man Marvel Legends 60th Anniversary Amazing Fantasy Spider-Man 6-inch Action Figure," is flying off the shelves faster than that wall-crawler swings through the city. And why? Because apparently, people can't get enough of that masked menace!
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Now, I'll admit, begrudgingly, that this 6-inch plastic nuisance is... well-crafted. With its "premium articulation," you can pose this mini-menace in all sorts of web-slinging positions. It's like having your very own pocket-sized public disturbance! The figure comes with six alternate hands. Six! As if one set of sticky fingers wasn't enough!
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And get this - it has detachable underarm web-wing accessories. Because nothing says "serious superhero" like armpit webs, right? But wait, there's more! They've thrown in a web line accessory. Perfect for recreating scenes of property damage and traffic disruption in the comfort of your own home!
Ā
Now, I know what you're thinking. "JJ, why are you even talking about this?" Well, folks, as much as it pains me to say it, this figure is selling like hotcakes. It's a "true original," celebrating that web-head's first appearance. And let's face it, the kids love it. Even if it does encourage admiration for a masked vigilante who's a menace to society.
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Product Details (because apparently, I have to include these):
Made by: Hasbro (they should know better)
For ages: 4 and up (start 'em young, why don't you?)
Origin: China (at least it's not from outer space)
Dimensions: 10 x 6 x 2 inches
Ā
Look, I can't believe I'm saying this, but if you're dead set on getting a Spider-Man figure, this one's... not the worst. It's well-made, highly poseable, and comes with enough accessories to keep the little ones entertained for hours.
Ā
Just remember, while you're playing with this toy, there's a real Spider-Man out there causing real trouble. And you can bet your bottom dollar that the Daily Bugle will be there to report on it! Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go wash my hands after handling this thing. And maybe my brain too.
Ā
Buy Now (if you must) Disclaimer: J. Jonah Jameson and the Daily Bugle are not responsible for any web-slinging, wall-crawling, or vigilante behavior that may result from purchasing this product
Hasbro
Spider-Man Marvel Legends 60th Ann. Amazing Fantasy 6-inch Action Figure
Spider-Man Marvel Legends 60th Ann. Amazing Fantasy 6-inch Action Figure
Ā
Spider-Menace Action Figure: A Reluctant Review Listen up, web-heads! J. Jonah Jameson here, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but there's a new Spider-Man toy that's... ahem... not entirely terrible.
Ā
Hasbro's latest cash-grab, the "Spider-Man Marvel Legends 60th Anniversary Amazing Fantasy Spider-Man 6-inch Action Figure," is flying off the shelves faster than that wall-crawler swings through the city. And why? Because apparently, people can't get enough of that masked menace!
Ā
Now, I'll admit, begrudgingly, that this 6-inch plastic nuisance is... well-crafted. With its "premium articulation," you can pose this mini-menace in all sorts of web-slinging positions. It's like having your very own pocket-sized public disturbance! The figure comes with six alternate hands. Six! As if one set of sticky fingers wasn't enough!
Ā
And get this - it has detachable underarm web-wing accessories. Because nothing says "serious superhero" like armpit webs, right? But wait, there's more! They've thrown in a web line accessory. Perfect for recreating scenes of property damage and traffic disruption in the comfort of your own home!
Ā
Now, I know what you're thinking. "JJ, why are you even talking about this?" Well, folks, as much as it pains me to say it, this figure is selling like hotcakes. It's a "true original," celebrating that web-head's first appearance. And let's face it, the kids love it. Even if it does encourage admiration for a masked vigilante who's a menace to society.
Ā
Product Details (because apparently, I have to include these):
Made by: Hasbro (they should know better)
For ages: 4 and up (start 'em young, why don't you?)
Origin: China (at least it's not from outer space)
Dimensions: 10 x 6 x 2 inches
Ā
Look, I can't believe I'm saying this, but if you're dead set on getting a Spider-Man figure, this one's... not the worst. It's well-made, highly poseable, and comes with enough accessories to keep the little ones entertained for hours.
Ā
Just remember, while you're playing with this toy, there's a real Spider-Man out there causing real trouble. And you can bet your bottom dollar that the Daily Bugle will be there to report on it! Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go wash my hands after handling this thing. And maybe my brain too.
Ā
Buy Now (if you must) Disclaimer: J. Jonah Jameson and the Daily Bugle are not responsible for any web-slinging, wall-crawling, or vigilante behavior that may result from purchasing this product